I Found Peace

Contentedness.

Peace.

Calm.

In eyes.

In touch.

In embrace.

In breathing.

 

I am overwhelmed with the reality of it all.   It exists.   It is wonderful.

Wow.

 

He is teaching me to play guitar.  He has shared with me some of his favorite hobbies.   I am accepting to the idea that this is not textbook.  I never would have considered the choice but it happened without my consent nonetheless.  He is teaching me how to allow myself to be happy.  He is honest.  He is real.   He has no idea.   The magnitude of influence he has on my life.  I  am grateful.  I am blessed.

Divorcing Chaos

I could create an entire blog to the intricacies involved in my own divorce.  To simplify –  I filed the papers in 2012 —  Now it’s 2016  — and we haven’t moved forward.  We have however been STUCK in family court for over 50 appearances with modifications and violations.

I found this article.   I feel the need to share it with the world.    It hits the nail on the head pretty damn hard.

Getting Divorced from Chaos

 

I have three children with my husband.

They are now 8, 7, and 5.  Our oldest is autistic, has ADHD, and a developmental behavioral disorder.  The second has PTSD.  The third was too young to witness much of the unfortunate events so he is still a pretty mellow cuddle bug.    THEY ARE MY WORLD.   They are what I was made for.   I love being their mother more than anything else in the day.   Given it is more exhausting than any other job I have ever held…..  it is also the most rewarding!

If someone told me 10 years ago that this is what my life would become… I would laugh and spit my coffee out in their face.   It’s INCREDIBLE how one, two, or three years can change the path of life so dramatically.

Vocabulary Lesson with Photos

Pictures to fit the words…

 

 

 

 

Sublime.

 

 

Euphoric.

 

 

 

Demanding.

 

 

 

 

Hope for Contentedness with Unconditional Forgiveness

Forever.   And a day.
Whatever life hits me with….

I’m still standing.  We’re still standing.

 

Somehow my heart has an unsurpassable amount of love for people.

It’s the most real…. unconditional…. true…. love… that I’ve ever known.

Forgiveness is real.     Hope is real.  Every single day choosing to not hold onto anger/resentment is real.

 

And I hope for nothing but the best in the future.

 

Hope for all good things…  no matter what they might be…

Hope for happiness for others.  Hope for peace for others. Hope for true contentedness.

 

Blessed to be where I am TODAY.

Where we travel…. and what we endure….

Makes us who we are.

And TODAY we are exactly as we should be.

(I wrote this May 26th…. BEFORE I drove across America (again) and BEFORE I actually KNEW where I’d be in September…. but now that I’m looking back at it… just hours before it’s posted to the internet…. I’m happy to say that things are simply…. GOOD and in the works…. I’m content… and constantly hopeful… still.)

Negative Nancy —

I have had so many run ins — with Negative Nancy —-

Especially about this past year and the (opportunity) to try something new, go somewhere completely unknown and teach a subject I wasn’t too familiar with almost 3000 miles away from what felt “comfortable”….

I heard the comment the other day… Someone who obviously has not travelled nor seen outside the 3 mile radius of their comfort zone said it was a “WASTE OF TIME” going all the way to Arizona to teach for a year when I need 3 years to certify (finalize) (officalize) (follow the rules-ize) my teaching certification…..

I however don’t see it as a waste whatsoever. Quite the opposite actually…. How many children can say they’ve travelled over 6,000 miles… visited 22 states already….. lived in an RV and were unschooled at museums, cities informational centers, national parks, and truly unique places all across the country????   (And I’m glad I’m at ease with the choices I’ve made for my children/myself/our specific situation/and our future).

“I thought it would be fun” “Why not” “It should be a good experience” “We’ve learned so much” “We’ve SEEN so much” “We’ve EXPERIENCED so much” “I would do it again in a heartbeat… but perhaps Montana next time”

I could go on for hours.

 

So to those who have a negative annotation to go with this past summer and last years summer of adventure…. please just keep your thoughts to yourself… This is a No Negative Comments Zone…. No Negative Nancy’s ALLOWED 🙂 🙂 😀

Hello August in New York :) :D

I can not WAIT for fall in upstate NY… I missed the changing leaves more than anything else (I think)….

I love how all the GREEN just turns to red, orange, yellow, brown, and a mixture of them all looking out over a hill of maple trees just makes my heart happy…

As for now, I’ve been soaking in the farmers, the farms, the cows, the fields and fields and FIELDS of corn rows ….. I missed the random goats all over the place… the pigs along the sides of so many roads, and the kids covered in MUD….

I am still going through pictures from our 4,000 mile journey and this blog was first made to “document” and “blog” along the way… update time —- Now it is simply my outlet and my way to say thanks and show appreciation to all the good things going on around me….

It will show my adventures as well but they’ll be dated a bit later than they actually happened (whenever I find enough DOWN TIME to go through the plethora of photographs that truly represent the most awesome adventure possible that I’ve had so far with my three happy bundles of energy)

so for now… a picture… (if I can make it work)

My Goal –

Found this good one while scrolling Facebook…
I have to share it.

It’s just… Perfectly stated.

I could see for miles……

such a calming. good. song. peaceful. joyful. I’ll take it.

Blessed are those who find JOY in the journey

We Made It — To New York

We’re here….. We’re adjusting…

We’re making do…. We’re seeing old faces and familiar places….

We’re sweating in the humidity!!!

There’s a LOT going on….
and now that I’ve looked back… I’ve taken over 20,000 pictures and have completely neglected “updating” my blog along the entire trip….

I will have to go back through and slowly post pictures along with awesome stories of the incredible adventure/opportunity that we had this summer.

Being back in NY brings back more challenges that are beyond what I could have even imagined….. complicated situations that need a lot of breathing space…. and patience….

I make no promises to catch up and update …. at least not for a few weeks or so because I have to conquer so many other things and arrange life in order to get my children in a routine and keep them healthy as well ad adjusted and assure them that things will be okay….

BAH.

I love life.
I love these kids.
I love the adventure we had.
We’re still on the adventure and I’m blessed.